


Kano's Theory Of Happiness

by archivedaccount27953



Category: Kagerou Project, Mekakucity Actors
Genre: Child Abuse, Family, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Multi, The fic in which Kano sees a neglected kid in the park and goes haha I do that, and then immediately adopts her, call 911 Nomi's baby, not sure what else to tag this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-18
Updated: 2019-07-18
Packaged: 2020-06-30 14:34:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19855198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/archivedaccount27953/pseuds/archivedaccount27953
Summary: Kano knows that nothing will ever fill the void left in his older sister's absence, in fact, he isn't exactly very hopeful for how things will turn out for his little family. Still, when a trip to the place that started everything leads him to meeting a child very much like him, he decides he has to try and make things right. No matter what, he'll pass on the lessons Ayano taught him to this new part of their family.





	Kano's Theory Of Happiness

There were some things that Kano never told his siblings. Generally, it was to protect them, sometimes to stop them from worrying about things they could not change. Other times, he simply didn’t have the energy to explain his reasonings. This time was like that but there was something else, something private about this, that he didn’t want to share with anyone. 

Sometimes he needed time that was only his, no one else’s, and so some secrets felt nice to keep. This was one of them. 

He only visited the park once in a while, when he needed time to reflect to himself. These visits were solemn and he always came here in August because that’s the week he had that time. Though that day had been traumatizing, had cost him his old life even, there were parts of it that he remembered fondly. 

Closing his eyes, he could practically still hear her voice, a sad smile coming to his face. 

Ayano had been such an energetic kid hadn’t she? 

He remembered so perfectly the way he’d panicked talking to her about silly childish things, because he didn’t often speak to other children, because everything was so tedious then. Yet, thinking back on it, remembering her precious little smile, the way her voice rose in excitement about a special interest, it had filled him with a feeling he couldn’t identify at the time. Now, he knew it was a feeling of belonging, of acceptance, and of family. 

He’d been so eager to go home that day but he’d give anything to spend a day with her one more time. Even just an hour would be more than he could ever long for, he knew he couldn’t have been blamed for taking it for granted then but it still stung a little. 

Above him the sun was setting, painting everything red and orange and brown. He had to admit he always loved walking at sunset, because even the city was beautiful then like a painting of some kind. The air was crisper, filling him with determination, and yet the view was enough to soften his aching heart. 

Soon he’d need a jacket leaving so late in the evening, but with the hottest part of august arriving he was still sweating at the palms as he walked. He supposed it couldn’t be helped, he didn’t really like this time of year though, because with it came painful anniversaries. August was the month of death and sorrow to him, and with it came rebirth and hope but he wasn’t sure he cared for those things either right about now. 

When he got to the park he felt a familiar feeling of nostalgia, and for once, he felt a little relief. He knew it was strange, to go to a place closely tied to his traumatic past for security, and yet when he thought back to those days things seemed easier now in some ways. 

Back then everything had been so complicated to him. He’d been scared, alone, stuck desperately trying to please someone who only ever wanted to hurt him. He no longer loved or missed the woman who’d birthed him, because his true mother had shown him something better in the time she was alive. Ayaka Tateyama was his mother, not the cruel person he’d once belonged to. 

Being in this place reminded him of the goodbyes that brought relief, of the new beginnings that were so gentle they hurt, and gave his current state of being a little reminder of its meaning. That’s right, he wanted to be alive, he wanted to heal and to become someone that scared little child could be proud of. If no one was going to prove to little Shuuya that he was allowed to live the life he’d wanted to, then he’d grasp it himself out of principal damn it. 

Feeling an old but welcomed determination pulsing through his heart, he smiled and little and entered the old playground. He fondly passed the tunnel he used to hide from the heat in, past the various equipment that he used to play. He was going to pass the swingset and head to a nearby bench but then he noticed something very strange and stopped immediately to stare. 

There was unquestionably a child on one of those swings. 

A child all alone at the park this late in the evening was strange enough on its own, but this one was clearly very young. If he had to guess he’d say two or three, however he was going to try and assume that to be on her own she’d have to be at least six or seven. Was she just very small perhaps? 

In addition to this, she seemed very sad. The swingset was far too big for her and she couldn’t reach both sides of it comfortably, so she held the chain to her right and stared at the ground sadly as she rocked back and forth. Her emotions were so clear to him in that moment he didn’t really know how to process it. 

Could this sad child not have been himself years before? Did he not already know her story? 

He almost had the urge to leave her be, because she seemed so lost in thought that it would be rude to interrupt. But then he remembered it was hardly safe for her to be out at night and it would be irresponsible and cruel for him not to come to her aid. So, he drew in a breath and came over to her, resting a hand on one of the poles the swingset was attached to and speaking up softly. 

“Uhh...hey there.” 

When he spoke she jumped and lost her balance, nearly falling backwards of the swing and holding herself up by the chain she’d been holding for support. Once she’d steadied herself she peeked up at him for a moment and just stared. Finally, she spoke up in a very small, mouse like squeak. “Are you talking to me?” 

He nodded slowly. “Yeah…” 

“Um...Hello, sir!” She managed to squeak out before tightening her grip to feel more secure most likely. “Who are you?” 

“Ah, I should have introduced myself, sorry about that!” he exclaimed lightly and offered a friendly smile. “My name's Kano, what’s your name, miss?” 

“Nomi,” the child answered simply. She looked up at him curiously. “How come you said hi when you don’t know me?” 

Her tone wasn’t one of distrust but rather of curiosity, something that he picked up on quickly. Her thoughtful demeanor from before, as well as the hesitant catch in her tone, gave him the impression that she was often curious about the way things were but had no one to ask about it. 

How familiar…

He kept up his smile. “Well, you seem like a friendly kid, so I wanted to say hello!” He scratched the back of his head a little. “Though I’ll be honest and say I’m a little surprised to see a kid here at this time of day…” 

Her face brightened at this first part, and she looked as though she had another question forming on her lips but then he added this and her face fell. She frowned then and glanced down at the ground. “Yeah… I guess most kids go home now. I’m not like them though, so I guess it’s okay.” 

Pressing his lips together, he drew in a breath and sunk down into the swing next to her. Holding on to each side of it, he crossed his legs and sat mostly still, looking down at the ground too. “Are you really so different?” 

She nodded. “Yeah. Kids come here with their moms and dads and run around and are really noisy, they kinda scare me too since I don’t understand why they seem so happy but act so loud.” She shrugged. “I’m quiet and don’t know how to smile like they do and my mom and dad won’t come here with me...They don’t like me very much I don’t think…” 

Closing his eyes, he took another breath as his heart stilled. He knew these words too well, he knew this story too intimately. Hearing it from a voice that wasn’t his own and hearing it from the perspective of a near adult who knew what it meant now, that hurt more than he wanted to think about at the moment when he still needed to act calmly so as to not scare the poor kid. 

“Yeah… That’ll do it…” He muttered this in a near whisper before he glanced back up at her. “Why do you think you’re parents don’t like you, hm?” 

She was suddenly quiet, swallowing and looking down at her hands. “Do I have to answer that?” 

Truthfully? No, she really didn’t need to tell him. He knew already the reason why she was wearing a long sleeved shirt and long pants during the hottest days of the summer, what she was being made to hide from him, and he knew immediately just looking at her small malnourished frame that she wasn’t getting enough of literally anything. He knew it and he knew the cause and yet he had to hear her confirm it if he wanted to act on it, didn’t he? 

“Maybe not… Are your parents mean to you, Nomi?” 

She thought for a few moments before she nodded. “Yeah… I know I’m their kid so I’m supposed to think it but they’re really kinda scary.” 

He pressed his lips together tightly and in the back of his mind he could hear his mother’s voice, the sad tone Mrs. Tateyama had when she’d said the same things he was going to say now to this kid. “Your parents shouldn’t be scary, sweetheart..” 

She glanced to him in confusion then. “Really? I thought they all were…” 

He nodded slowly. “Have you ever watched the people here and thought they were different than your mom and dad?” 

She nodded then, humming. 

“What made them seem different to you?” 

Nomi stared at the ground for a few seconds before answering, her voice slightly more subdued than before. “They smile at the kids here and...and they hold their hands and tell them nice job...My parents don’t smile when they look at me and I’ve never done a good job at anything…” She was quiet for a moment until she added very softly, “And Mama’s never held my hand before so I don’t really know what it feels like…” 

The words hurt. The sad waver in her voice, how quiet she got suddenly, hurt his heart so much he nearly began crying. Still, he couldn’t lose his composure now. He took a breath, let it go, and then he carefully used his legs to bring his swing close enough to hers and hold his hand out to her. “You can hold mine, if you want…” 

She looked up at him and then down at his hand for a moment and then slowly, with a trembling tiny hand, she reached to meet his but stopped halfway as though it might hurt a little to touch him. After a moment’s struggle, she seized her courage and set her hand carefully on top of his. He carefully took her hand and then brought his other and placed it on top of hers. She nearly flinched up but then her shoulders relaxed and she blinked. 

“Oh…”

He kept his smile but oh was it so hard not to scoop her up and hug her and never set her down again until she didn’t have a care in the world. He’d known Nomi for just a few minutes, less than ten he was sure, and yet he already felt determined to stop destiny itself in its tracks if that’s what it took to keep her safe. 

“Would you like to be my friend, Nomi?” 

She pressed her lips together and chewed on them for a second. “Yes please...if it’s okay…” 

He nodded. “Yes, it is, and it’s a good thing because friends share stuff with each other, right?” 

“I dunno...I never had one before so…” 

Ah. Pain. Still, he smiled sadly. 

“They do! And I have a secret I’ll tell you, okay?” 

She nodded and so he leaned closer to her and spoke up softly, making sure he still spoke clearly enough for her to easily make sense of what he was saying. “My mom used to be really scary too. She hurt me real bad and I used to come here like you do...Seeing you all alone here reminded me of it because I was different from other kids too. So me and you are the same, see?” 

Nomi listened to him carefully, looking surprised upon hearing this. However, as she processed it she seemed to understand a little. She looked up into his eyes a moment and asked an innocent question. “Do you come here cause you’re scared too?” 

Silence struck him at the question. He hadn’t realized she was that perceptive. He’d rather not think about the things that still scared him, about what he knew was coming. In fact, he briefly wondered if it was even safe to be reaching out to her at a time like this… August was such a dangerous month for children. 

“Ah...well, sort of...But it’s not because of my mom anymore, you wanna know why?” 

“Yes please.” 

“Because I left and she’s not my mom anymore.” 

Well, alright, that was technically a lie but he didn’t want to get into the details of his biological mother’s murder to a young frightened child, and if he was going to try and convince her of what he thought he would, this would suit his purposes much better. 

Nomi’s eyes widened in surprise then. “You can do that?!” 

When he nodded she considered this for a moment, seemed excited even, but then she shook her head. “No...I can’t do that, can I? My mama doesn’t like me but she’ll get in trouble if I don’t come back, she said so!” 

He decided to take a risk then and ask her directly. “Does you mother hit you?” 

She hesitated. “Will she get in trouble if she does?” 

“Please answer the question, Nomi…” 

“...Yeah. She does that. Lots of stuff hurts at home…but I’m bad so I gotta learn my lesson.”

“Well, hitting your kids is bad, it makes her very bad actually. So she should get in trouble to learn her lesson, shouldn’t she?” 

He could sense the gears in her head turning as she processed this logic for a good few moments and then she slowly nodded. “I guess so...but where would I go?” 

He pretended to consider this for a minute to seem more casual about it. “Well, I’m living with my siblings and my friends these days. No one gets hurt there and you could make lots of friends, doesn’t that sound nice?” 

The sun had set almost entirely now, leaving them in the gloomy darkness. He had no doubt that if he had not shown up when he did Nomi would have been made to try and find her way home through the city at night and that angered him more than he cared to admit. How many times had she done this? Why did so many children go uncared for in a world like this? 

“Uhuh but...I’m scared. I’ve never thought about not having mama anymore.” 

He nodded, instantly understanding as he stood, still holding her hand but coming to stand in front of her. “I couldn’t back when I lived with my mom either but I felt better after she was gone...I know you will too, so won’t you give it a try?” 

Finally conceding, she nodded and he sighed in relief. 

He carefully let go of her hand then and dusted off his shirt absently. "It's sort of a long walk home, is it okay if I carry you?" 

This was sort of a lie, the park was a reasonable distance from the hideout, however he didn't like the idea of making a small malnourished child walk anywhere when it was late and she must have been getting tired. 

She nodded. "Okay." 

He picked her up then carefully and though she was rather small he was still surprised at how light she was. Bringing her into both his arms, he held her protectively and began to pet her hair a little. "There we go, that's better." 

She nodded and snuggled up to him, his little smile becoming more genuine. "Thanks Kano, sir… You must really like me a lot to hug me right?" 

He managed a nod. "Yes, I do like you a lot. You're a good kid." He ruffled her hair a little as he began walking. "Speaking of which, how old are you, Nomi?" 

"I'm five, how old are you?" 

Holy shit. He'd known she looked young but by the way she talked he'd assumed she was at least seven. Though, thinking about it, he wasn't really surprised that she acted older than she was. That wasn't really out of the ordinary for people like them.

"I'm sixteen." 

"Woah you mean you're all grown up?" She seemed rather surprised at that. 

Thinking of himself as a grown-up already made him laugh. Like he'd ever be old enough for that. He smiled a little. "Well, almost…" 

Before they could continue talking his phone began to buzz in his pocket and he stopped. "Ah, one second." 

Shifting her to his hip so he could hold her with one arm and retrieve his phone with the other, he looked at it and as expected saw it was his sister calling. 

"Hello, hello!" he greeted casually as he pressed the phone between his ear and his shoulder so he could hold Nomi with both arms again and continue walking. 

"Hey, it's getting late, where are you right now?" 

"On my way home, don't worry." 

"Oh okay good!" She seemed relieved. "I just wanted to check up on you, so see you soon-" 

Before she could hang up he interrupted her. "Ah, wait a minute. I need to tell you something…" 

"Oh?" 

He smiled and winked to Nomi who was looking up at him in curiosity. "I made a new friend and she doesn't have anywhere else to go, so I'll be bringing her in with me tonight." 

"Oh a friend?" Her tone seemed surprised but he could imagine her nod far too easily. "Alright we'll try and be ready for her then!" 

"Perfect, we'll be home soon." 

Once he'd said bye he hung up the phone with his face and was attempting to get at it when Nomi reached up and took it for him before putting it carefully back in his pocket for him. 

Ah. What was this feeling now? Oh that's right, that would be pride wouldn't it? 

Smiling, he ruffled the top of her hair affectionately. "Thank you, Nomi. You're a very good kid." 

She blinked, obviously not having expected any praise. Her face flushed a little and she hugged him. "Aah… thank you." 

Burying her face against his shoulder to hide her embarrassment then, she muttered, "you're really niiiiiiice." 

He nodded and began to pet her hair to soothe her. "Thank you I try my best." 

By the time they got to the hideout, Kano's arms were sore but he was relieved they'd made it home safely. 

In his experience, you never knew who could be lurking at night. Perhaps it would be mothman, if he was lucky, but the chance of villains lurking ready to pounce on the first vulnerable person Kano carried with him were too high for him to really be comfortable. 

Still, they made it home without incident and for that he was grateful. 

Nomi was sleepy but she looked up at the big abandoned apartment building curiously. "Oh I've never gone here." 

He nodded. "This part of the city is basically empty, it was going to be demolished and rebuilt but they lost funding or something I guess." 

"Um…" She smiled politely. "I dunno what that means but cool!" 

He giggled then, realizing how incomprehensible words like those were to a child so young still. "My bad, what I meant to say was nobody's here because they were going to knock everything down and build it back up again but then they lost the money." 

She still seemed a little confused however this explanation seemed so satisfy her so she nodded. "Okay, thank you, sir!" 

"You can just call me Kano if you'd like!" 

She considered this as he entered the building with her and nodded slowly. "Okay yes sir, thank you, sir." 

He had to resist a laugh at that, thinking she sounded a lot like Seto used to. Ah, so respectful but entirely too anxious. He wondered how she'd grow and change over time, the thought making him much more hopeful than before. Though truthfully, he was just happy getting to know the kind of person she was currently. 

Once he carried her up the stairs, noticing she ducked her head and flinched upon hearing his footsteps echo on the metal stairway, he brought her to apartment 107. 

"Alright, my friends are inside, are you ready to meet them?" 

Nomi nodded slowly and so he carefully set her on the ground. She pouted a little and stepped to be a bit closer to him so he smiled warmly and held onto on of her hands and this seemed to make her happy. 

He unlocked the door then and pulled it open to be met with the light of the hideout and then he led her inside. "Welcome home, Nomi!" 

Her eyes widened then and as she followed him inside she stated and gawked at seemingly everything. The hideout wasn't particularly different than most places from the inside, aside from a few abnormalities, but he thought it was only natural to be impressed with your new home so he assumed this was such a case. 

She squeezed his hand a little and breathed. "This is amazing." 

"Oh, Kano is that you?" 

Before he could respond to her. Kido and Seto came from the hall and stopped to blink down at her. 

"Oh," Seto said quietly. 

Kido looked to Nomi and then back up to Kano. "Your friend is a child?" 

Kano nodded. "Yes. This is my friend Nomi! I know it's sudden but she's going to live with us from now on!" 

"E-Ehh?!" She sputtered and looked at Nomi in surprise then back up at Kano. "Alright but we're talking about this because I have concerns." 

Kano nodded and knelt down long enough to ruffle Nomi's hair. "I'll be right back okay? Seto will stay here with you, so don't be scared!" 

She nodded and he followed Kido into the nearest room to fill her in on the details. 

Nomi stood perfectly still and seemed ready to cry until Seto came closer and knelt down as his brother had before. "Don't worry, you're not in trouble or anything. We just didn't know you were going to stay here is all...They'll come back soon, okay?" 

She nodded stiffly. "Okay, thank you Mr. Seto, sir!" 

Sighing sadly he gently reached out and began to pet through her hair. This seemed to both comfort and perplex her which he thought was interesting. 

He hadn't expected Kano to bring a child here but in hindsight he thought it made sense. He could tell that Nomi didn't have anywhere else to be just by getting a good look at her. 

She also looked like a normal child in many ways, such as her naturally pudgy face and shortly cropped hair that was tied up in little baby twin tails. She looked young and cute and like she deserved nice things. 

Oh he was going to give her so many plushies.

Kido and Kano emerged a few minutes later and she took a breath out and clasped her hands together. "Okay I understand now!" 

She managed a smile and gently rested her hand on Nomi's shoulder and Seto continued petting her hair. "Welcome to the Mekakushi Dan, Nomi." 

"That's what we call our little family," Kano added before she could get too confused. "This is my sister Kido, my brother Seto, and as I said before I'm Kano! We have another sister here too but she's asleep still so you'll meet her tomorrow okay?" 

Nomi glanced between the three of them and tried to take everything in at once then trying not to tear up she nodded. "Okay." 

"Alright good! Now that you're officially one of us we can make up your room!" Kano continued. 

"I-I get a room?" 

"Of course!" Seto said, leaning into her line of site. "You can decorate it however you want too and I'll put my stuffed toys in there too so you have lots of animal friends!" 

"That's right!" Kido exclaimed. "Oh have you had dinner yet? You must be hungry if you haven't, I'll go make you something what would you like?" 

She stopped and turned to Kano. "Oh she'll need clothes to change into...One of us will have to make a run to the store to get some pajamas so she can have a bath before bed." 

"I'll go do that don't worry!" 

"Um guys…" 

When they heard Seto speak they turned to see Nomi was still standing there and her eyes were brimming with tears. She looked so shocked and overwhelmed at that moment they didn't know what to do about it. 

Then, suddenly, a red hue started to engulf both her irises before her eyes rolled to one side and she dropped to the floor without a sound, as if she were dead.


End file.
